Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Umm, am I ok?

Hi, my name is Elise, and I am a hypochondriac. Like, big time. I wrote an entire post on this very subject months back, and it pretty much describes me in a nutshell. I'm not ashamed of it, heck I embrace it as a part of who I am! Although if I could turn it off like a switch, I would do it in a heartbeat. Because honestly, it's quite annoying. Thinking a new symptom I may be experiencing one day could be a tumor, or because I have an unexplained bruise on my leg, "it is a sign of leukemia." Now don't get me wrong, I don't sit around my house like a hermit imagining symptoms all day long. I can go weeks, even months without thinking these things. And when I do, it usually only lasts for no more than a day because lets face it, it really wasn't a tumor or leukemia. My bad =)
I have said these very words to Justin probably no less than a thousand times "I think I'm dying." To which he shakes his head, or rolls his eyes because he's heard it before. Which kind of makes me wonder, "am I crying wolf? What if one day I actually do get sick and he doesn't believe me!"
Now with all this said, Dr. Google is my friend. I can find the good, the bad, and the ugly on there to confirm my worst fears. I don't know if being a nurse adds to the drama because I can back it up with legitimate knowledge (however not too much because I do take care of babies after all, but I do remember some stuff from nursing school!)
Anyway, the whole point I am trying to make here is that I have not gone to Dr. Google in a while, and when I did, it was only for a split second.
I have been getting bloodwork off and on these past few months after my miscarriage to rule out causes as to why I may be having them. I have been tested for autoimmune disorders, clotting, thyroid etc...all of which have come back normal. Then I got tested for MTHFR. Honestly, I don't know what it stands for, all I know is that it is a loooong name. I read that 40% of the population has it. There are different severities of it, it can affect different things in your body. Well I asked to get tested for it because a few of my friends have it and I know a bit about it from them. And I heard it has been linked to miscarriage. Now I won't bore you with all the boring medical terminology and tell you that I am heterozygous on the c677t gene...oh wait, I just did! All that means is that my body doesn't absorb folic acid like it should. I guess clotting issues is a big thing with this too, but my clotting tests and a specific clotting test they did at the same time as the MTHFR came back normal. Since this is my genes and I can't change it, then all I have to do is take an activated form of folic acid so my body doesn't have to do it for me. Could it really be that easy? I sure hope so. That doesn't mean that is what caused my miscarriages, but I'm all for excluding all possibilities. I guess vitamin B12 uptake is affected too so I have to take an activated form of that as well. Now with all this said, you think I would go running to google to find out all possible scenarios. But I haven't. I did google it at the very beginning just to see what it was. But haven't been back since. Very weird. Which leads me to my question, "am I ok?!" Normally I would google the h out of it, but actually I am ok with the answers I've gotten so far. Well kind of, I did have to go to another Dr. in the office to get a prescription for the special prenatal vitamin, but hey, we are our own best advocates right?
So I pray to God that taking these pills is what does the trick. I know it could have nothing to do with it, but in all sincerity, I hope it does. I hope it's that easy, because for the sake of my sanity, that's all I can tell myself right now.

And just for laughs...



Happy Wednesday my friends!

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